Nuxe Rêve de Miel

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A fortnight I was sick, which you may have heard me wail about once or twice or, if you’re in my inner circle, every five minutes in lurid detail (‘What does this mean Polly?’ ‘Is this normal Claire?’ ‘Áine, am I going to die?’ etc).

I’m rarely ill. This means I forget what it’s like, and so the situation is full of surprises. SURPRISE! Your excrement is angry! SURPRISE! It’s the water you drank 2 minutes ago, back up through your mouth but a different colour! Or, as happened towards the end of the week - SURPRISE! Your mouth has dried up so much you can no longer move it or speak.

Sometimes not talking has it benefits. I talk too much and am a chronic oversharer as the first part of this review will attest. Problem is, the following Monday I had a week’s worth of filming to do and I’d have preferred my on camera lips to be slightly more ‘off duty Kylie Jenner’ than ‘Kate Winslet lying on that wood at the end of Titanic’. It was all hands on deck, pardon the ship pun.

I like a lip scrub, but this called for something slightly more genteel than I’m used to. At Claire’s suggestion I went over my gob with a bit of Pixi Glow Tonic, and that certainly did something. Plastering on the Carmex tided me over (more Titanic puns, I thank you) but it wasn’t really clearing anything up.

The first day of filming arrived after a weekend spent knocking back enough water to sink the……you get it. Desperate, I was, right up to the point of getting in the make up chair, where the delectable artist Jen handed me this buttery solution that smelled faintly of honey and with a teeny tiny grain to it…..the sort of grain I enjoy in, say, a charcoal smoothie. It was miraculous. I’m reliably informed by the website that the balm is tested in the ‘extremely cold Canadian climate’ which sounds extremely and unnecessarily rigorous. Hard to say whether it was just the water catching up with my system or this lip balm itself, but both together solved all of my problems and I’ve decided never to get sick again.

Luxe Rêve de Miel lip balm, £10.50

Rebecca Humphries