I, like the rest of the country, revelled in the jacket-donning, magnum-hoovering weather we all experienced earlier this week. But on Thursday, something happened. The clouds arrived. The UniQlo heat tech crept back out, whispering ‘who’s laughing now?’ in Japanese . Essentially we had to go back to being in a normal February, but this time with a ‘here’s what you could have won’ longing.

Much conversation has been had about whether SAD is a load of old tosh, but all I can say is looking out on to a crap rainy morning fills me with an acute case of ‘mardy bitch’. Yesterday a friend asked me how I was, and unable to fully articulate the feeling I found myself responding with ‘I just…..I feel like I want to wear a lot more eyeliner. You know?’

She did know. Winehouse knew. Kristin Stewart’s make up artist in ‘Twilight’ knew. Embracing the dark side is sometimes the only thing for it. Lucky for us, it can feel pretty damn powerful in a ‘when Ursula in the Little Mermaid turns into that hot anti-Ariel’ way.

Stock up on these & let’s cast some spells.


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First thing’s first. With all items listed it’s very easy to go a bit haywire, adding a little bit more and a little bit more until you’re pitch black up to the brow line.

So this is what I do.

Once you get to your eyes, put eyeliner on first. Yes, even before eyeshadow. Decide on the shape you’d like, how big etc. Then go for broke. You need to make sure the skin on your lids is nice and taut. That’s not a sexy thing to say, but it is helpful.

If and when you’ve made a mistake, or you think it’s too big, take a cotton bud and dip it in the Simple remover.

Then carefully erase what you need to, pare it back, whatever until you’ve achieved what it is you’d like to look like. You can repeat this process of applying and erasing until it’s right.

Put your eyeshadow or whatever you’d like to wear on once the eyeliner is dry. You should be able to make out the eyeliner underneath.

Last thing you do is go over the eyeliner again, but this time with the perfect template.

Ta da!



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I wear this almost every day. It’s essential to apply with this brush as it’s the perfect thickness and makes life extremely easy for those of us who are a bit less Da Vinci, a bit more ‘…..da f**k?’. The pot lasts for absolutely ages as well, though fair warning: it does get dryer towards the end and slightly more difficult to apply as a result.



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I got this in a BAFTA party goody bag but I promise that’s not the only reason I’m saying it *smiles slyly*. It’s really good, like a sharpie. There’s a fatter version, pleasingly called ‘Fat Liquid Eyeliner’, but that one is like an actual sharpie. Do not use that one, you are not a flip chart.



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This is a cheaper version of the Eyeko, and works just as well. The only difference is it’s thinner and doesn’t tend to last as long, but at £5.99 who really cares?



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When it comes to a pencil eyeliner (or lipliner, actually) get one that you can sharpen. Some of them have a sort of plasticky thing going on where they’ve been moulded to look like a fake pencil, and once the tip is gone it’s gone and you’ll look for a bit at the end to twist to make more pop out but it won’t be there. And you’ve been conned.

Proper pencil eyeliners can last for absolutely ages, and any old make up sharpener will do. I like this pencil because it’s cheap and it is, after all, only a pencil. No Benefit I will not spent £17 on Bad Gal, no matter how kohl-y it claims to be, no matter how it comes with a little sponge blender. Smudge this Rimmel one about with a cotton wool bud and it’s exactly the same.



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Just look at that picture tho. Maleficent realness.

I’ve popped this on here last as it is most certainly a luxury item and one that requires a proper brush to apply. This one from Dior does the trick.

You know when you take your driving test, and for some reason your leg does that thing where it shakes around even though it’s never ever done that before and you otherwise are totally calm? I have friends who have that exact thing when it comes to drawing a straight line on their face with a liquid eyeliner. For those people, I include this option because it’s utterly foolproof. A powder that you can layer up, have total control over and it’s almost impossible to eff up.


Rebecca Humphries